Saturday, June 19, 2010

I had a bad day

Yesterday was possibly the worse day I have ever had at work, there have only been a handful of bad days in my entire life at work, yesterday topped them all! The worse part was that I let somebody get the best of me. Have you ever been in an argument with someone and after its over you replay all the words that were spoken? Then if you are like me you start thinking about all things you wanted to say and all the things you should have said. Well that was me yesterday, I let someone not only make me cry but gave control of my mind and let them put thoughts in my head. This person that ruined my day shall remain nameless but it was a guy that confronted me with something in a very unprofessional manner and was way out of line. He got in trouble and he apologized but its really not over because he still has something against me and doesnt like me. I wish I could say that was the end but then one of his co-workers started something about me and doesn't like me and wants to talk to my supervisor. I will leave out all the details but I just feel my character was being attacked and thats a horrible feeling. All those verses in Psalms about being saved from transgressors and the wicked, and God hearing the peoples cry began to pop in my head, Psalms 37:1,2 "Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong for like the grass they will soon wither, like the green plants they will soon die away." This whole incident has really taken a toll on me but I pray I can be stronger through this.  God's love always perseveres I pray mine does too!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Jaded No More

It seems that life does not go as picture perfect as we would like it to, that would just be too easy and not so adventurous. I’m going to be completely honest and vulnerable right now and tell you I hit a rough patch last week, I mean fell into a ditch hit my head rough patch. Lance and I are in a transitional time right now; we have just resigned from the children’s ministry at our church and really feel like God is taking us into a new direction. We have not been operating full time in our strengths and God-given gifts in the last year in a half, now I don’t say that as a bad thing. Has God used us, Yes, were we suppose to be where we were Yes, I don’t doubt any of that, without this past year and a half we would not have grown in our ministry experience and our marriage. We have been applying for new ministry positions at other churches which is so weird for me because I’m so use to my masters and Relevant family; whom has pretty much help shaped my foundation for God. I am excited because we are walking into the unknown completely by faith and know this is of God. After saying that how could I have hit a rough patch well its simple I’m human and let my flesh get the best of me. It only took a second really before my mind fell into a spirit of doubt and discouragement and started eating away like termites all the words God was telling me. Not too long after I began to feel really down, I hate classifying myself as a word and speaking it over my life especially a word that has creeped up in my past but the word “depressed” wanted to hover over me. I started feeling like I was living this jaded life and that’s a bad place to be. This story does have a good ending; my wonderful, caring, understanding and knight in shining armor husband came to my rescue. He spoke into me all the things I needed to hear to erase the entire negative that was building up, its moments like this I know God put us two together for a reason. A wise woman said “Make sure you don’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands because you need to be able to throw some stuff back” I agree with her on that, and that’s what I have done thrown back all those negative thoughts the devil has thrown at me. This life is not perfect and definitely has its ups and downs but I have learned that life can also be very beautiful. We don’t have a lot of time to fulfill the purpose God gives us so we can’t waste a second of it letting the bad things overtake us!
Psalm 143:10
"Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your
good Spirit lead me on level ground."

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Miss it or Miss out

The other day I was driving to work and randomly I started reminiscing about the past. I was thinking about my high school year; the friends I had, cheerleading, and sleepovers. I began to miss it, miss my friends, and miss the hang out times, the cheerleading competitions and cheering at the football games. I started thinking about after high school and still working at my first job “Jamba Juice,” going to college, and the new friends I made. That time in my life was a decision time a “growing up” time and I remember thinking there is something bigger out there than me and wanting more for my life; I miss that time as well. Then it hit me I miss my whole life that I have lived so far, not missed out but miss it. Funny how that word has two completely different meanings one is to fail to hit or strike, to take advantage of and then there is the meaning to regret the absence or loss of. You can miss out on something and then you can miss a loved one. The second meaning is the one I’m feeling I miss some of my old friends and miss the memories. I started getting sad about it like I wish I could relive my life yet I don’t have regrets. I think about my years in Masters Commission and the roommates I had, when I started dating Lance, and our wedding day I miss those times too. I miss all the vacations I have taken with my family and all the graduations, that wonderful feeling of accomplishment. 
All of the sudden it hit me! I shouldn’t be sad but happy because all those times were so good and made me so happy, all the lessons I learned the “growing up” mistakes, and all the fun times. That’s a good life and I realized I need to be thankful that I have those memories to turn back to when times do get tough. So here I am telling all this because we only have this life once and to make sure we are truly living and enjoying what God has put in front of us where we are at in the moments. Whether you have a hundred good memories or maybe just a handful you still have today to make more good memories. Miss your life but don’t miss out on it!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Summer Lovin

June is here and I can’t believe it! I’m not sure the correct date that officially starts Summer I consider it summer when June comes and the weather is in the high 90s! This is one of my favorite seasons; I love the heat and the fact that if you can’t stand it then there are the pools, lakes, and the ocean to balance it out! It’s the season of delicious corn, cherry pickin, and fresh squeezed lemonade. Barbeques are the traditional theme and bathing suits are the most worn outfit .This is the first Summer I don’t have really big plans and I’m not really sure what to expect which is always a fun adventure. There are however two things I always do in the Summer one is I like to make a Summer Goals List; a list of things I like to accomplish whether it’s read a book or work on a project before Summer is over. The seconds is tanning since the sun is a great way to get my intake of Vitamin D and the color has a nice glow to it as well. 
Summer always brings back memories when I was a child since that was when we would take most of our family vacations and play with our friends. One vacation that I have taken since I was 9 that we still take now is we go to the lake, "Bass Lake" thats where I learned how to water ski and wakeboard. There were a couple summers when all the kids on the block would get their rollerblades and play street hockey every night after dinner until the sun went down. Some days we would just swim in our neighbors pool and other days we would stay inside and catch a movie at the dollar theater. One tradition that was my favorite was sleeping on our trampoline under the stars, we did that one a lot until the sprinklers would come on early in the morning (: Oh summer how I love thee!