What is parenting?

I'm not really sure if this post has any point to it besides me just sharing my thoughts but I thought well that's why I did create this lil space to begin with. 

So here it goes....As Bowden gets closer to 18 months, I have been thinking a lot about how this parenting thing is pretty easy; we got Bowden on a pretty good schedule, sometimes he tells us when its Night Night time, I can pretty much guess when he's gonna poop (maybe you didn't want to know that) we know what he really loves to do; like go on walks, play outside with Linus, and build blocks. That sounds good right, like we are doing an okay job. It's getting so good, we are like we should have more kids, we know what to expect now. Bring it on!!

HAHAHA

YEAH RIGHT!

Are we NAIVE (probably) but I never thought much about what parenting entails.

When we first talked about having kids, I concerned myself a lot with learning about babies and how to take care of them and sure Lance and I talked about how our kids are not gonna get spoiled and they will only get a couple presents at Christmas (ya that one didn't stick), and we would occasionally talk about discipline; how we got spanked or our mouths washed out with soap and we turned out great,so our kids will get disciplined. But to be honest Discipline....I don't like it, not sure how to do it, not even sure if it works. 

And here we are at 18 months.... Just to give you a glimpse

Bowden enjoying personal time eating a snack and watching Mickey

Then he flipped the switch, it was kinda funny cuz I wanted to take a picture of him smiling at me, and then he didn't like that.

Had to add this one, he was so upset, the blurriness is him throwing his head back n forth, notice he finally got Linus' attention

It's been like this non stop the whole week, we even had an all sprawled out on the floor in Jamba Juice moment, luckily there was only one other lady there and the two employees who were teenagers, probably thought it was entertaining. However, I'm embarrassed because you feel like you can't console him or like you even know your child. I wish I had a picture of that one but like I said I was embarrassed and that would just look wrong taking a pic of my son while he is sobbing his guts out on the fruit stained floor.

So lately, I have been getting great advice from other moms, researching a lot on parenting styles and everyone does it so different according to their child's personality and the behavior. There are some really good articles I pinned on Pinterest, not to throw my beliefs on other moms but just to share in case your curious what's out there. Here are some: 

What I wish I had known before I had kids that I know now 

5 Tips to Discipline Toddlers 

 31 ways to pray for your kids

Some days, I would worry so much if it was a tantrum and how to stop it, instead of really going to the root of it. This last week Bowden hadn't been feeling good, he ran a fever for 3 days and hasn't had a big appetite. Then one day, he seems to be doing pretty good, eating fine, sleeping good, and all of the sudden throws the biggest fit. I didn't think to put the last few days with this tantrum because he seemed to be fine and thought he is just throwing a fit. When really he could still not be feeling well. It's only been a week, he could still not be feeling well and I shouldn't assume the worse, especially in a toddler.

I have those fears, "Will my kid be spoiled?" "Will he be rebellious?"  "What if he throws a tantrum in a public place?" oh wait... he did that last one already lol. 

After getting great advice,  we are gonna try some things out, if they work, great if not, it's not the end of the world, I'm learning to not stress about the lil things, love more, be more compassionate,  and be patient (that's always a hard one) you can't go wrong with those!

In the end, I love my son, I think he likes me okay, he is not out to get me, even though it might feel like it, and he is learning to talk and communicate and so am I.

So what is parenting? 

Parenting is hard on the sick and fussy days when your not sure if they are teething, gassy, or tired but easy on the days they take good naps, eat all their meals, and give you some time while they entertain themselves with toys. Parenting is frustrating when you know they want something but can't seem to solve their puzzle but it is also so rewarding when they squeeze your neck, give you kisses, and run up from behind to give you "leg hugs."Parenting is one of the greatest joys I have experienced and such a blessing that I wouldn't trade it for the world!

Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it."

The Mom Club

 I want to dedicate this post to all the moms, 1st time moms, and moms to be. 

After I found out I was pregnant it was like I was immediately  inducted into an elite group called "The Mom Club." It was amazing, it is amazing! I have gotten a chance to meet new moms, connect with old mom friends, and help soon to be moms. It's a kind of camaraderie that you just feel like you're never alone and I want to say thank you to all the moms that help me, encourage me, share their stories and give me advice! I may not have used all the advice but it's definitely in my mom bag for next time around!

As I was thinking back on this year I just wanted to share a couple things I have learned from experiences. I guess you could called it Life Lessons from Bowden part 2.

1. Be wise in what you say to a New Mom

I remember this one time my husband and I were about to go into a very important meeting at a new place and we weren't able to get a sitter so we brought Bowden with us. Well, wouldn't you know it, he decides to fall and hit his mouth on the edge of a glass coffee table, right before we go in. Blood is literally spuing out, I couldn't tell if he needed stitches, lost a tooth, and it was so intense. Well the blood calms down but me I'm still shaken up. We tell the lady we are meeting with what happened, why we were late, and her response was that it's not gonna be the last time and to get use to it....I'm sorry but I will never get use to my son being in pain that was just the worse thing you could say to me. So here's my take, yes I'm a first time mom but let me experience it, I know more incidents will happen, I hope they don't but I just don't think you can plan for something horrible, that makes no sense. Bowden fell last night and hit  his nose on the edge of a tile step  and my heart still jumped out of my chest. From this experience I hope I never tell a new mom to get use to your child getting hurt, but I would say yes it does happen and it's unfortunate, nothing can prepare you for it, just pray God gives you the strength to handle it.

2. "Comparison is the death of Joy" -Mark Twain

I think this one might take me longer to grasp but I will be honest its been really hard to not compare Bowden to other babies his age this last year. It would be the tiniest thing that probably seems ridiculous, like when he's gonna crawl, get a tooth, talk, and the funny thing is after I would stress about it, usually the next week he was doing it! I have learned that in time he will get there and just enjoy the ride, why rob moments of joy and replace it with stress and comparison that's not fair to Bowden. He doesn't compare me (well not yet)

Our beach trip to Cali in July when Bowden took his first steps at Grammy and Grampys.

3. Let him try new things.
It's that natural instinct in me to protect Bowden, which is why Lance is the perfect balance to my world, cuz he is the adventurous one. I would  keep a close eye and parameter on Bowden 24/7 which in most cases I should but even if I was right by him I wouldn't let him try things.  Most moms are probably the opposite of me, but I'm learning! He is not gonna learn new things if I'm always hindering him to try.

The Newest member of our family we adopted..Linus

4. A life lived to the fullest
I think at first my schedule was completely ran by Bowden, which is understandable but after awhile I began compromise my schedule for his, when really I just needed to slowly fit him into my schedule so that my life doesn't become all about him but he lives life with me and Lance. There were times at first it was really hard for me to go on a date and leave him because I felt like he couldn't live without me but he always ended up being fine.

Well I'm sure there are more, but those are just some of the things I have learned this last year.

camp bowden

what's a party without tattoos

Camp Bowden has come and gone just like this last year! I can't believe he's gonna be 1 tomorrow! So many emotions! We had a little birthday party tonight for him and  it was very special because we also dedicated him! Not your traditional baby dedication I know but we are not your average, normal people, we like to do things different! Bowden's grandpa also a pastor dedicated  him in our backyard and I loved it. Bowden is so close to my heart but I have learned He is not "mine" he is God's first and as easy as that sounds sometimes I'll admit, it's hard because I worry about him (I think it's harder for moms, naturally)

Since he was born I felt time slipping by so fast and a lot of life lessons began to hit me hard. I have learned to cherish every single day, there hasn't been a night this last year that I didn't go in his room to check on him "one more time."

I have learned to be more grateful, I'm so grateful that we had a healthy baby boy this year and I pray that he continues to stay healthy this next year as well.

This has truly been the best life changing experience ever and I'm so blessed to be his mom, God redeemed August 19th, 2012 for me, what once use to be a sad day in remembrance, is now a celebration of a new life! Happy Birthday Bowdie bear, I love you!

Motherhood Meltdowns

I sit here as my son finally falls asleep for his morning nap (thank the Lord) and try to gather all my thoughts on the last 24 hours. Excuse me if they are a bit scatter. Part of me is letting it all out! I remember during the first month after having Bowden being super emotional, hormonal, sensitive, and a bit defensive some most times. Well lets just say those feelings have creeped back in all over again. You know when you start feeling good about yourself and your motherhood instincts when you can calm your child and you know what helps? Well that all went away these last 24 hours. Bowden was not a happy camper, super fussy, woke up in the night screaming, wouldn't take his bottle, etc....My husband will sometimes say "What do you think is wrong with him?" and I'll usually have an answer like "Oh I think he's teething, or he is having gas," or sometimes it's "He didn't get a good nap, so he's fussy," but yesterday after using all those answers it came down to a frustrated, "I don't know what's wrong I give up!"
Okay I didn't really give up on my son, I'm not that bad (even though it gets to the point where you kinda feel like a horrible mom)

At one point I wanted to just cry right alongside him (maybe I did a lil) What do you do when you have exhausted all your mom solutions? Well after saying 3 prayers over my son, for his gums, and his tummy, and to calm him down. I started praying for me lol. No really, I had 2 headaches all day, which is kinda rare for me. Then I thought okay he loves the car, let's go for a ride, which worked and he fell asleep.  Then wouldn't you know it, it starts all back up again as soon as we get home! So I went through my mom checklist just to make sure I'm not missing something obvious

- Diaper (just a lil wet)

- Check temperature (no fever)

- Is he hungry? (well possibly he won't drink his bottle but he did eat some food)

-Is he teething? (I think so, for like the last 2 months)

-Is he gassy? (a lil but he has gas a lot)

-Is he tired? (should be he woke up last night)

Okay now what, well I decided to gather myself together, so I set him in his crib (while he is screaming), folded some laundry, and then I realize okay it's not the end of the world, out of all of his days so far this just happens to be a bad one and it's gonna be okay. Now that I'm all good,  I'm about to grab him and calm him down....and what happens next....he fell asleep!

I wish I could say I know what's wrong with him and while I really do think it's a combination of teething, hunger, and tiredness since he woke up last night, I just don't know and I don't always have to have the answer. That doesn't make me a bad mom does it? What I can do..Do my best to love him and try to comfort him.
I'm sure I will experience more of these, and some day the tables will probably turn and he might have the meltdown, I guess it comes with the territory of motherhood, but for now I learn to take them for what they are and then....
 I go get a Starbucks cause that just seems to always make things a lil better!

8 Months and some Randomness

Easter Sunday, investigating the plants in the backyard.

 It's amazing how much in one month a baby can change, grow, and learn new things! It's been really fun around here! At 8 months Bowden is sitting up, rolling like crazy, loving food, and getting ready to crawl!

One of his favorite things right now is clapping, he likes to grab your hands and make you clap. He also just likes watching you clap, he gets a good laugh out of it!

One of my favorite things, is this

I'm kinda the last one to hear about these things, so I get pretty excited when I try something new and it turns out great!

The Nubby Nibbler, wow this thing is amazing, it's a teething ring and a snack toy! Although it is a lil difficult to clean, it's a great alternative for teething babies and gives them a lil treat. Unfortunately for all the teething that's been going on, we have no teeth to show for :(

We had some friends down from North Carolina and their son Q is one month younger than Bowden so they had a lil playdate...they loved it, pretty much Q told lots of stories to Bowden and Bowden listened...what good friends they are!

 For more fun this week we had a lil photo shoot,(if you haven't notice this post is a lil random)

He was being a serious model

Oh Hello there!

And then he got tired...

Thumbsucker! I see you!

Happy 8 Months Bowden!!!

Lastly I decided to take up gardening! I have been wanting to for quite some time but I feel like it's such a delicate hobby that I don't want to get discouraged easily, so, I'm starting out slow. We have a great backyard for it, there are some plants already growing but eventually I want to re-do it and put my own herbs and flowers back there. I was watching the Today show and Martha Stewart did lil edible garden parties in big containers, I thought "I should do that" she did a tea party one with lavender, mint, lemon, and a few others and also a salsa one (which is what I decided to do) with cilantro, tomatoes, onions, and peppers.

Wish me good luck I'm really excited about this!

Starting Solids

The last 2 weeks we started Bowden on solids and it's going quite well! What made this even more exciting is I got to try out one of the gifts from my baby shower "the baby bullet," it's amazing! I knew when I was pregnant that I wanted to make my own baby food, for the health and cost benefits, and some friends of ours did the same, so I registered for this and it's been so easy to use! Of course if you have a food processor or a regular bullet that would work fine, and even a blender but I love this set because it comes with storage containers to make ahead and then freeze as well as containers that you store in the fridge with a lil dial on it, that you can adjust the date.

Benefits of making your own baby food:

-You save money, it can cost anywhere from $1-$1.30 for one jar of baby food vs. $1-$2 for produce that will give you about 7 servings(you can actually go organic and save money!)

-It doesn't contain preservatives, fillers, sweeteners, additives

-It's fresh and healthier

- You know what's going in the food your giving your baby

Our Dr. said to start Bowden with veggies first and that we could  introduce a new veggie every 3-4 days, just to make sure he didn't have an allergic reaction. 

Some Signs of an allergic reaction are:
Gas, Diarrhea, rash, clear runny nose, vomiting, itching, stomach pain, coughing, wheezing, difficulty breathing, lip/face swelling, eye swelling, eczema, and fatigue.

 Low risk allergy foods are:

applesauce, apricots, asapargus, beets, carrots, peaches, pears, plums, rice, and oats. 

They say the safest 1st foods to try are:

sweet potatoes, avocado, peas, brown rice cereal, zucchini, squash, apples, pears, and bananas.

Last week, we started with carrots (which was probably not the best 1st veggie to try, can be messy and stain clothes/bibs) All I did was steam a bag of organic carrots til they were soft, add about 1/4 cup of water and put it in the bullet and "bam" baby food! It's recommended to eat within 3 days in the fridge or if frozen then up to 30 days.

This week we tried zucchini and Bowden loves it!

I can't believe we are already to eating foods :( seriously can this kid grow up any faster!?

Bowden's Traveling Tips

At the Seattle Zoo

Lance and I love to travel, and hope to be doing a lot more in the future. I have never really thought about traveling with a baby, until these last 3 months. In December I guess you could say Bowden had his first trip, it was a 6 hour drive to visit family and he did awesome pretty much slept the whole way. Since we were driving, we literally packed up Bowden's whole room (the swing, the monitor, humidifier, play mat anything that would fit in the car) the only thing we didn't have to bring was his crib! We wanted him to feel at home and make us feel good too and let me just say it worked! 

Then a couple weeks ago we took another trip, same distance, about 6 hours, however this time we stayed in a hotel. Once again he did really good on the drive but the hotel was a different story, because I didn't want the neighbors to hear him if he woke up, I would get up every time he cried to calm him down. Let's just say I didn't get much sleep that trip!

The ultimate trip was this last week. Bowden's first airplane trip! We flew to Washington to visit our good friends and my aunt. Now I was extremely nervous about this one, obviously you can guess what was going through my mind... the long flight, should I bring the stroller, the carseat, what if he cries, what if his ears hurt, what if he has a poop explosion, what if he can't sleep, will the time change mess him up...and so on. Well as much as I tried to prepare myself for this trip, it didn't matter. I had gotten so many tips before hand which some did help but really like we all say, "every baby is different!"
The biggest thing I had battled with was whether or not I should buy Bowden a ticket or just let him ride for free in my lap. Well I decided to have him ride on my lap, which for the most part was fine, until he got sleepy. Bowden sleeps so great in his car seat and even in his crib but to have him just fall asleep on me sitting is hard, I need to be standing and rocking him for him to fall asleep. So we struggled with that a little I think next time I would probably just fork up the money and buy the seat. Moms you know your baby better than anyone else stick to your instincts! The first flight was horrible it was so full that we couldn't lay him down to stretch and it was uncomfortable. You don't know if you should sit by the window and be away from people or be on the aisle in case you need to get up!
On the positive, Lance and I were pros going through security! We brought the car seat and stroller because we needed it in Washington and I'm really glad we had it, it made it easy to have in the airport. The stroller we brought was just a base stroller that you attach the car seat and it's super light so it made it easy to go through security. As far as taking on bottles, some airport security procedures are more strict. Going there we just had to take out the bottles (which just had water in them) and put them in the tray. Coming back they actually took the baby food and bottles and checked them. I must say even though we had a horrible flight on the way there, we knew what to do/expect for the flight home and it turned out great! Sometimes you need one bad experience to learn and make the next one good!

10 Traveling Tips for the future:

1. Bring a variety of toys but don't give them out all at once. This worked great when we drove and on the plane, I would pull a new toy out every 30 min or once they got bored with it.

2. Having them eat or give them the pacifier when you take off, does work and helps their ears not hurt

3. Put a size bigger diaper on during the trip so there's no surprise explosion, thanks to my friend meg I also do this at night cuz Bowden started peeing through his diaper!

4. Ask if the flight is full, if not have your spouse/friend sit on the aisle and you at the window seat and put your baby in the middle, don't feel bad, the rows were made for 3 people not 3 1/2, plus your doing that other person a favor and your baby will love to lay down and stretch out! Also having that extra seat makes it easier to change a diaper, since the changing table is super small on the airplane ( I couldn't even find it the first time, but it's there above the toilet)

5. Think through the entire process from buying the ticket to going through the airport, checking in, going through security, getting on the plane, etc. For us I'm glad we bought the ticket during the day, cuz he probably would have had a harder time sleeping at night on us. The plane ride there had one stop but we didn't have to get off, this was good cuz we changed his diaper, let him stretch out, and could walk around.

6. When staying in a hotel, call beforehand and ask if they have cribs and what kind, most have the pack n plays so just bring your own sheet or blanket.
7. Double check the diaper bag, extra diapers, burp cloths, clothes, meds, wipes, bottles, and I just put my wallet in there so I didn't have to bring an extra carry on.
8. Time Change, it was only a 2 hour time change which seems small but waking up at 5am versus 7am makes a huge difference but we learned to just be flexible and roll with it and he adapted quite well!
9. Read the TSA rules and the airline expectations, there is so much I didn't know because I never had to travel with a baby, like bringing their birth certificate, making sure to check the car seat and stroller and tell them you want to do family boarding.
10. Say some prayers! Prayer works!!! Thank you lolli for the prayers!!

At the airport

Bowden's new friends from Washington, we miss you Bax and Tucker (and of course Meg & Rusty!)

Bowden and Aunti Grammy at the zoo

Until next time, I'm glad to be home, the trips were amazing but made for a tired baby, thrown off  his schedule. What we will be doing this next week is getting back on track, introducing baby food, and catching up on sleep!

6 months

Well Bowden is 6 months old, I can't believe it, I feel like I should start planning his 1st birthday party already...yikes! I can't believe it but I must say, these last few weeks have been my favorite and really it keeps getting better! I'm loving this age, Bowden is smiling, laughing, and talking like crazy (well baby talk) it's so fun around here! Also, I'm proud to announce.... drum roll...
I have lost all my baby weight and then some!!!!! Wohoo.....Summer get ready, I'm coming for you!!! Sorry if you thought I was pregnant, that will not be happening anytime soon :) I think we need to celebrate, Cheescake factory anyone?!
If I did a recap on these last 6 months I definitely have to say the first couple were interesting and lots of adjusting...okay they were tough! There were however some great moments; like when Bowden first started to laugh, when he started grabbing toys, when he rolled over, when he started putting his toes in his mouth and one of my favorite times was when he fell asleep on me and woke up and I had my eyes closed and he would grab my face so I would open my eyes and then I would shut them and he would do it again. I love watching him learn knew things and every week something new happens! Definitely lots of good memories.

Oh you know just talking and hanging out with dad

Hugging his valentine bear

Of course there were some not so good times.....
 At 4 months Bowden was on a good schedule but I learned that growth spurts, ear infections, teething, and the flu can easily throw your routine right out the window for like a week. One of the things that started at 4 months that we are still dealing with but not as bad is Bowden started scratching his head. At first we thought it was cuz of his cradle cap but then he would do it a lot when he was tired. One morning I woke up and found him all scratched up with blood on his head! It was crazy, so we started putting mits and beanies on every night, then he got smart and figured out how to get them off. Now I have to make sure I trim his nails atleast 2 times a week. I guess it happens to lots of babies and no one really knows why but it just stinks having your baby look like he was in a cat fight!
Another thing we are dealing with is Bowden started rolling from his back to his tummy in his sleep. We woke up one morning to him crying and he was on his tummy, immediately I got scared because I read that SIDS is at the most risk between 1-4 months and doesn't really decrease until they turn 1. Bowden can roll from his tummy to his back so I thought it shouldn't be a problem but I guess it scared him, when I saw him he was planking looking around crying. Ever since that day he has done it almost every time I put him in the crib. They say if they have a strong neck and can hold themselves up not to worry and to put them back on their back. The first night I would check on him so many times, that anxiety started overwhelming me so I have really had to give these worries to God. I can't believe how much love I have for this lil guy, it just keeps growing and growing! It makes me think about God's love for us and it's so unfathomable! Through these last 6 months my life is forever changed and in a good way. I feel so blessed, when I met and married Lance, I became a better person and I feel the same way now having Bowden.

Happy 6 months Bowdie Bear, we love you!!!

Baby's dry skin

This post is probably boring to most people out there but really I just thought this would be good for me to know for the future in case I forget (which seems to happen all the time) and for any other moms dealing with baby's dry skin.

We have been battle ling with dry skin for awhile, it seems since we brought Bowden home from the hospital. Since Lance and I both have dry skin unfortunately it was bound to be passed down. I feel like I have become a professional moisturizing consultant. We have tried so many different kinds of lotions. Of course this is my opinion only but in this particular order I feel works best for us.

Aveeno (I like this because it's not so greasy)

 Aquaphor (this is definitely a good sealant but has that gloss look) Cetaphil is an equal to this

Burts Bees (I really like this one but its more of a good everyday lotion)

Johnsons Natural Baby lotion (I was a lil disappointing with this one, but it's a good standard lotion)

If you know any other moisturizers that work great, please share!